Accepting is a Choice

I have grown in my past couple years of “adulthood.” I’ve learned what boundaries are and how they affect people including me. I’ve tasted life on my own – loved it, but wasn’t ready. I’ve grown apart from people and grown closer to others.

But if one thing stands true, I will not beg for anyone’s friendship. I will never be perfect. I make mistakes. It has been brought to my attention that you don’t trust me. I understand. I left you in a time when you needed me. I needed me too. 

19 is a rough, but 19 and watching your best friend fight in the ER is more than anything I have ever imagined. My body couldn’t handle it. My body can’t handle much since my training ended. The vomiting in the bathroom at work returned, and sometimes it still happens. 

Come talk to me. I have open arms, open mind. I can see from your point of view. Please try to see from mine. 

I began a new relationship and you became last on my priorities. I figured we had grown apart and our lives have began to go in two different directions. Change hurts and relationships ending are not easy. I still love you just the same even if we don’t talk much anymore. I see you. I’m listening. But I’m not going to run and beg at your feet to talk to me. Texting isn’t going to suffice for me to tell you what I need to tell you. The ball is in your court. Do with it what you wish. I’ll still be here. 

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