Silent Screams

It’s not the thought that tempts me to cut. 

It’s the sudden emotion replaying in my mind and throughout my body that gets me weak. It’s the silent scream for relief that no one hears until it’s too late. 

It’s not the business of my everyday life. It’s the loneliness that enters my mind when I have nothing to come home to. It’s the overwhelming feeling that I am a failure. 

It’s not the past that haunts me daily. It’s the mistakes I’ve made throughout the day. It’s the not having anyone to confide in so I lock it up and keep quiet. 
It’s not the people who bother me. It’s the monster inside my mind terrifying me one whisper at a time. It’s the silence under the bed until the lights go out. 
It’s not the sunlight that masks these emotions. It’s the masquerade of colors that covers up the pain inside. It’s the calm before the storm. 
It’s not the scars that remind me. It’s the replaying of emotions in my mind and throughout my body that makes me stop. It’s the silent scream of relief.  


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