Are you who you want to be?

Driving home from work tonight I was playing the same old station with the same songs that repeat over and over again. However, there was a song that came on that I had not heard in a while and a line in that song says, “This is your life. Are you who you want to be?” It got me thinking.

My life is chaos. I work non stop. I’m repairing damaged relationships and building new ones in the making. I’m up from sunrise to midnight just surviving. After a while, my life starts to spin in circles, and I’m standing still in the middle of it all.

It’s EXHAUSTING.

Trying to be everything all at once really makes me lose my mind. Sometimes I need a break. Maybe I won’t sing for a month, maybe I won’t paint the bathroom, maybe I’ll keep to myself for a while – there is nothing wrong with that. Time is running out. As time flies, so does my heart. I’m so busy all the time that I often become grumpy and irritable. I’m losing patience, love, and grace. That’s not who I want to be!

As I begin to sit down and think about a sermon that I heard this morning, I’m starting to realize my life has a long way to go before it’s healed. The guilt that I carry and the sin I fall into have got to go! I don’t want to be the reason why people don’t want to be Christian. Christians are weak and unreliable. That’s not who I want to be! I want to be so on fire that people actually want to be a Christian, a follower of Christ. Love and understanding is the only way to approach someone.


I am not here to gain the world and lose my soul.

Mark 8:36

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